Real tears

Today I saw real tears come from Noah.   :0(    I was mixing up a batch of cereal for him, a big whopping 1/2 teaspoon to mix with his formula.  He ate it all earlier today, but completely refused and boy did he let me know he DID NOT WANT IT!!  

I went to change his diaper before rocking him with his bottle.  As he screamed and cried my heart just hurt for him.  He just wanted his bottle and a nap. What was taking me so long to get 'r done?  I wiped away his tears, grabbed his warmed bottle and sat rocking & feeding him, all the while listening to his little CD with scriptures and kids singing along with the writer/singer about not worrying and how we reap what we sow. 

I hugged and kissed him and apologized for making him cry.  He just kept sucking the bottle, didn't even acknowledge me or my tears that were coming up.  He didn't have to, I knew he was happy now.  My thoughts turned to my husband Keith.  He's got a little competition with this little guy for my attention.  I thought to myself how much I just hug and kiss on Noah...easily...but no so with Keith.  I mean I do kiss and hug him, but not alot like I do with Noah.  I know he needs my love just like Noah does.  I apologized to God for being stingy with my affection.  I don't want to love like that.  I want to lavish my loved ones with thoughtful actions and service unconditionally like I do for Noah.   I prayed the Holy Spirit would prompt me to love like He does. 

I want my life to reflect all I know about my Savior, that means a changed lifestyle.  It's a good thing God is patient....I'm still under construction.